DYSTOPIA–A new child-care center for the children of students, faculty, and staff at Dystopia College will be named for one of the college’s most generous donors, Shi-Shi Fuggerson, the college’s president announced today.
“The need for a child-care center on a college campus would never have occurred to me when I was starting my career as an administrator,” Dystopia President Overly Payeed-Admyn said at the dedication ceremony for the new facility. “But times have changed, and we have to try to accommodate the needs of our Dystopia family members who have erroneously decided to start their own families at awkward times.”
Fuggerson, a local millionaire, who has been cleared of all molestation charges due to a lack of credible evidence, said that Dystopia’s need for a child-care center provided the perfect opportunity to “give back to the community.”
T. Allen Culpepper