DYSTOPIA–A local homeless man has donated five dollars to Dystopia College, the college’s Office of Special Gifts confirmed today.
OSG spokesperson Shirley Knott said that the man, who is seen frequently on the streets near the Dystopia campus, made the donation in person at the bursar’s office.
Knott said the man gave his name as M. T. Boxx and said that, after reading about the college’s financial woes in one of the newspapers he was using as a blanket, he had decided that the college is in far worse shape than he is.
“I ain’t got much,” he said, “but at least I ain’t in over my head and don’t owe nobody nothing.” Despite the limitations of his resources, he said, “I ain’t in as bad a shape as some people,’ adding, “My mama brought me up to look out for those less fortunate, and I’ve always tried to stick to that and do right when I can.”
T. Allen Culpepper